It gets lonely.
But loneliness is ok.
Loneliness is where we find ourselves.
Where we learn who we are.
But when the loneliness gets bad.
I simply think to myself.
There's someone out there.
Who is just as lonely as me.
Things Left UnsaidSo many things were left unsaid.
I never got the chance to talk.
You were always yelling at me.
You talked me into things.
You made me do things.
You tricked me.
You made promises.
And never kept any.
And I trusted you.
With everything I was.
But the girl you knew is gone.
She grew up.
She got stronger.
She made friends.
Something you never where.
Friends don't use each other.
She could have cried.
She could have begged.
For you to stay.
But she didn't.
Something changed that day.
She became independent.
She doesn't need you anymore.
But you seem miserable.
Do you regret leaving?
Do you miss me?
Do you miss us?
You had your chance.
And threw it away.
Now I'm gone.
Now I'm free.
Part 1PART 1
I could feel the warm salt water splashing against my legs and belly as I ran. It was exhilarating. I loved the feeling of the sand between my toes and the wind in my fur. Which made me just want to run more. The warmth of the sun started to fade as it set. A small cliff came into view so I set of towards it. I climbed the damp, smooth rock as the waves crashed around it.
My dad used to bring me here when I was just a pup. He used to tell me that this was the most magical place. The sound of the waves and seagulls was so soothing. Like a sweet symphony. I would come here and find him howling though I could never tell what or who he was howling for. This was his place. Our place. That is until he left.
BetrayalEvery day the same old lies,
That cut and sever weakened ties,
Of bonds that were never meant to be,
Just drowning in an endless sea.
Of strangers in a faceless crowd.
It's because of you,
Now I hope you're proud.
Of what you did to this now tainted soul.
Beaten, broken, swallowed whole,
By the darkness invited to envelop my being.
They always say that believing is seeing.
But I guess that's just it,
you see my forced smile.
After all it's been plastered on my face for awhile.
But is it too late? I don't really know.
But the longer I sit here,
The more darkness will grow.
Am I too far gone? Is there no hope?
Will I keep slipping down this bottomless slope?
Do you see now what you have done?
I give up...now you have won.
I'm trapped, enslaved in this dark empty trance.
I say I am fine...
But will you risk that chance?
Aurora CorporealisOn those days, you leapt from planes
unafraid to fall because you were already flying.
On those days, you did not speak
because the words slipped between your vocal cords
and could not make a sound.
On those days, I could see you through vast skies
over open oceans and beyond slow-falling snow
because you stood so tall in a crowd of billions.
On those days, you were the northern lights
and the whole world became the southern hemisphere.
On those days, I watched your horizon turn on itself.
Frost crept over your limbs and hail fell into the firmament.
I was not afraid because I did not understand.
On this day, I erode under warm water,
crumble into clay against the wall,
hyperventilate as steam fills my lungs
and I write my worry into words.
I am afraid because I understand.
JudgmentCapricious, erratic creatures,
You observe the likeness of unknown features,
Condemning, curving your mouth with disdain
For the decorum of oneself shall obey your malicious reign.
The abomination you painted in your narrow mind,
Was no more than an eccentric brother yet to find
Utter compliance you seek,
Yet of vain dejection you only reek.
The enmity that guides your every line
Is but poison you gulped instead of light so divine.
Depart from the ignorance that compels you,
Underneath the deception lies all that is true.
GayI am gay.
I'm not a disease, I'm not a problem
I'm not an affliction
I don't need treatment.
I don't need help
I'm not sick
I'm not confused
I'm not a sin.
I am gay.
I'm your daughter
Your co worker
A complete stranger
I am gay.
I need love, just like you
I need smiles
I need support
I need a hug
I need a friend
I need a family
I need acceptance
I need understanding
I need you
I am gay.
I know what love is
I know what pain is
I know what hate is
I know what life is
I am gay.
And I need you to love me
The same way you loved me before you knew
I am gay.
And I have experienced hate
From more people than just you
I am gay.
And I wont change.
I wont give up.
I wont back down.
I wont pretend.
I wont lie.
I wont deny.
I wont hide.
I wont hurt.
I am gay.
And that's okay.
There is a weight
You asked me to hold.
(Just for a while,
Just for a while.)
My tendons strain and snap,
I lack your Atlas strength.
The crushing force of gravity
Makes me weak, makes me sore.
Take it back, take it back,
But you’ve gone away.
I’m sinking down, I’m sinking down.
The water rises to my throat.
Pushing down, rising up
Drowning and drowning and drowning.
Take it back, please take it back,
Where have you gone?
I’m pinned beneath this weight,
With water to my nose.
My lungs fill up with salt,
Choking and screaming and breathing
Only freezing thickness of water.
Where is that mild friend oxygen?
Where has he gone?
My stinging eyes are blind here.
I cannot to escape, unwilling
To shed this leaden snare
Wherein I dwell confined.
I grip it tightly.
Surely I will die,
Sweet air has left my blood
I lay back and let black water take me,
Frozen fingers loosen on Your weight.
And all at once
it falls away
I watch i
HetaliaxDepressed!Reader:Self-Inflicted AchromaticHetalia x Scary! Depressed! Reader: Self-Inflicted Achromatic
I want to be a person just like you, don't you see?
I want to be a person who is still being "me"
A tired sigh escaped your lips. You were just so damn tired. The other countries said that you, (f/n) or (c/n), was scarier than Russia himself. But of course, you have lived 2500 years with wars and bloodshed always trailing after you. You just really want to be happy. But all those wars and blood imprinted on your mind, you really just released off a dark (a/c) aura and a stoic atmosphere.
It really would be nice but I'm paying a price
'Cause I'd really, not be me and that would not suffice
You asked yourself, "I know my face doesn't show my pain. But isn't it obvious in my eyes? I'm lonely and hurt" You rubbed your numb (s/c) wrist, yesterday's cuts still had a colorless ache to it. You picked your silver knife, twirling it around watching the others argue. The said knife is the one you also use to cut yourself.
A dream which
The GardeniasI told you I had wildflowers growing in my veins
and you thought it was quaint,
so when I took shears to my jugular -
you wouldn’t help me cut them out.
You thought I’d be opheliac
if they bloomed, splashing white
into my already paling wrists.
Maybe you thought the perfume would purify me
and being a tragic heroine
would be better than just being tragic.
Their roots choked out my heart and
to my blood
as I died,
drowning in the after-effects of Pretty,
all I could hear
was you telling me that you loved
that I had Gardenias in my eyes.
On losing a friend(it did not end in tears.)
I could give you armfuls of oceans, great
mountain ranges wrapped in silver bows,
a coral reef gleaming like a sapphire chain
but you will always ask for a dormant volcano
and a star you can hold in your palm.
And I have tried to be that star, have tried to
combust bright enough, shrink small enough
but it is never enough for you. You kiss my
mouth with those carmine lips and swallow my
heartbeat with your gentle laugh and I glow
I glow and you go you go you go on stringing
me along a trail of crumbs, making me forget
that I am starving myself for your table scraps.
I could press the slats of pre-dawn light into your
answering machine, could fold dust columns that
fall between venetian archways into your bedsheets,
could hang the lost jewels of jaguar fangs clattering
above your dreamcatcher and you would only ask for
a dormant volcano and a brittle sea-salt glass wave.
And I have tried to capture the tides and I have tried
to blow glass but my hands are clum